If hangovers were people John Goodman would be living in my skull trying to eat the back of my eyes
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
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