Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
I want to let you in on my two latest life goals. Have a photograph of me squirting whipped cream into a midget's mouth, and have sex on a roof.
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
I just had a 30-minute convo with an irrelevant fuckboy from college who decided to tell me FOUR years later he’s sorry for sleeping with 3 girls at once including me.
I just found out how I got home last night. The bartenders found me sitting in the brush peeing and called me a cab. Have you seen my underwear?
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