I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
How am I?!! The turkey is dry as shit, I'm watching football in low def and there's no beer b/c everyone is in aa. Fuck giving thanks.
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
He woke me up at 5am to recite nursery rhymes to our fictitious unborn child.
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We will go to karaoke
Okay, well, i'm covered in paint, haven't showered & have already been drinking, so if I fall on the floor in a blaze of depeche mode & beer tears, you can't pretend you don't know me
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
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