Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
Randomize
