need another drink. this is the easiest way
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
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