I was just standing there and then BOOM! She was attacking my face with her mouth.
I don't get it, man. She treated me like a sexual predator but treated you like a piece of meat.
When i light up a cigarette people look at of like i'm going to pee on their children.
you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
Dude, I danced with Abe Lincoln! How could last night have been any better???
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
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