On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
Im at a strip club, and the dancer just farted into my face. The bad part about that is I could taste the wings I bought her earlier
The only birthday messages I got from men were from my 8th grade boyfriend and the bouncer at our bar. I think I'm doing something wrong in life.
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
The only thing I'm asking santa for is my period.
And vodka?
And vodka.
Yesterday I dumped him, went out for my birthday, hooked up with someone else, and today he still fed my cat. Living with your ex ain't so bad . . .
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
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