I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
Zak is like the Picasso of masterbatory texts
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
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