He had one of those small greek statue penises
What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
Just got escorted to my 7:45 class by an old woman because I was too hungover to not realize I was four floors too high.
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
Come on in and take your pants off
Randomize
