you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
you said "how could you not want to hook up with me when I have these abs" and then proceeded to rip your shirt off in the middle of the bar. I'm pretty sure you were hammered.
JESUS
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Randomize
