i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
Got a blowie from her in the cab on the way home. Made awkward eye contact with the cabbie who said, and I quote "Keep the mess in her mouth bro", I did so only out of respect
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
I was just like oh sorry I'm peeling meanwhile my legs are on either side of his head and I look like a fucking Komodo dragon
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
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