Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
You high fived me for banging your sister but lock me outta house bc I ate your pumpkin pie? Priorities bro
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
Randomize
