Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
Holy sore nipples Batman
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
Would you be so kind as to inform your husband that my truck is forever cursed by mashed potatoes and it's his fault.
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
Randomize
