I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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