she kept yelling 'call me bella'
a queef is a wish your heart makes.
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
Woke up this morning with a note saying "great sex, see you never". Why can't I meet more women like her?
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
Randomize
