If I had a sex resume I'd get tons of jobs.
hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
Stop calling dibs on everything with a vagina you jackass.
That should be the title of my autobiography.
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
Randomize