six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
Is it bad that I feel proud to be the first one to puke in the apartment? And I did it in style?
You straight up painted the counter with steak, tequila and beer. You owe me a knew toothbrush.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
Randomize
