Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
I just cut my nipple shaving
You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
Something about getting whistled at in my work clothes while crossing the street with three Nuvarings in my back pocket feels wrong.
They want yo temporarily sterile ass.
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
Legit just looked at the gin bottle and said, “Aw fuck, I’m going to feel this in the morning.”
Randomize
