He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
Sometimes I stop and laugh and think "and these are my actual life choices".
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
I knocked over his glass and he yelled "Oh no the boxed wine!" and slurped it off the coffee table. Then he showed me how to mix maple syrup, Jameson, and coffee. My family is better than your family.
The cat's telling me to stop taking acid, and to start doing the lords work. I'm almost 99% sure he's talking about the dark lord.
THIS CAT'S GOING TO TURN INTO A SNAKE AND KILL ME! GET OVER HERE NOW! BRING YOUR WAND.
Randomize
