I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
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