Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
I don't care if my next phone has to run on the blood of virgin koala bears, I don't want to be scrambling for a charger.
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
Randomize
