and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
I was wondering if I fell or perhaps got hit by a truck, then I remembered, it's cause I did a splits contest at the bar
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
I know he'd never cheat on me. It'd be like choosing Mexican tap water over Patron.
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
Randomize
