Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
I need ur penis! This is not drunk texting, either! This is I need ur penis texting. There IS a difference!
I wish I had a waterproof laptop so that I would watch porn in the shower.
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
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