just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
you went into starbucks asked for a mocha "on the rocks"
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
why are our drunk alter egos so much more successful than us?
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
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