youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
i'd fuck the guy who invented dead baby jokes.
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
I don't know what else is in your wedding gift, but I just pulled out a pair of handcuffs in front of her grandmother.
Also a whip and a blindfold. Don't be a bitch, enjoy it!
Randomize
