I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
I realize that when i start making 24-themed music videos in my head to the song 'love is a battlefield' that i really need to get out more
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
I wish the inside of the tampon box said "CONGRATULATIONS YOUR NOT A MOTHER!"
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
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