Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
Some old chick is rubbing my thigh and saying she needs some Memorial Day dick. Her teeth are kind of gross but I'm going for it.
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
Randomize
