what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?!
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
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