he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
I need like a hormone stopper. Or a chastity belt. Or like a lady business alarm that goes off when I'm being too drunk.
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
I made out with the hosts' boyfriend, infront of her, drank way too much, slept in my car and convinced everyone that I'm really a nice person. If that's not skilled lying, I don't know what is.
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
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