I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
Nothing quite says Coachella like me doing high yoga in the middle of a field by myself
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
And the next thing I knew I was blowing this random hot italian bartender with an uncircumcised penis in his work closet
Can you please venmo me emergency money? i have no pants.
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
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