Most awkward thing ever just happened. I was reaching in my purse to get something and a condom fell out into the woman's lap next to me. At least she knows I'm safe.
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
The bar has bullet holes in the ceiling, and the country singer had been playing drunken weezer covers. A man just bought me a beer on the grounds that I 'have his back' in a fist fight with a stranger texan. And, yes, the bartender is wearing a sherif's badge
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
Hired a new intern today and we have something in common. I blew her boyfriend in high school. Do you think she knows?
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
It is NEVER not funny to me when I am sitting at a table and I've touched the dicks of every single person I'm sitting with.
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize