Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.
So I thought I was slick leaving his room this morning all incognito. Little did I know I was wearing his football jersey with his name across the back... stilettos & my bra was left behind. never seeing that again
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
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