Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
my room smells like sperm. sweet.
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
His ankle bracelet only gets in the way when I'm trying to take off his pants.
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
You can't hold me to anything I said last night; I was drunk on orgasms.
Randomize
