Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
My doctor just informed me that my food allergies qualify me for a medical marijuana license. I get it on Tuesday. It won't help at all, but my life is awesome!
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
You handed J your Mayan-pocalypse shopping list and told him he wasn't getting laid unless he brought everything on it. Where is he supposed to get a live goat?!
Nothing shouts "I'm single" like a thousand needlepoint pillows.
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
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