if i can run in heels then i can drive
He dyes his hair, fake tans and lies constantly. What did you really expect from him?
A better fuck for starters.
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
Randomize
