So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
First thing I heard on the radio when I got in the car: "humans and dinosaurs used to live happily together"... I need to stop listening to Christian radio...
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
I feel like my vagina stays drunk longer than the rest of me. It's always super sensitive and hungry the day after drinking.
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
I made him say "i realize i'm cheating on my girlfriend" five times aloud before i would hook up with him. Somehow that has to lessen my bad karma
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
On my way to get pizza I followed a dog into Salvation Army where I was just hired
I'm pretty sure I imagined the dog... They still hired me
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
Randomize
