This is not my ceiling
You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wow, you know I need to stop drinking alone when I pour my drink into my hand and offer it to my dog,
She wouldn't go home with me cause I forgot her name. I didn't realize it would matter after she danced with her vagina on my face
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
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