There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster.
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
Maybe they'll dismiss me from jury duty after they smell beer on me. You can't keep me in a cage and then give me an hour and a half long lunch break next to a beer fest and expect sobriety.
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
I just made the most “single life” Amazon order ever: protein bars and condoms.
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
Randomize
