i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
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I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
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