The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
Those nachos came to me in a dream
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
Randomize
