you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
did i leave my keys in your car? BTW: sorry for throwing that drink on your date.
btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
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My parking ticket this morning was 30bucks. I feel like I'm paying the city to fuck you.
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
Its mothers day, andI woke up with 12 bar stamps on my face, holding orange juice and a box of tampons. This can not be happening
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
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