my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
You're such an expert partier. I feel like 22-year-old recent graduates should have to intern with you.
I'm a pro at the other 9-5
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
Randomize
