We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
at some point when you're making out with the ex girlfriend of your ex fuck buddy who happens to be the ex boyfriend of the girl that you just got drunk with who was hitting on your current fuck buddy who is best friends with your ex boyfriend, it just hits you: oh my god i need to get out more and expand my social circle.
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
I had a dream last night that I had sex with Abe Lincoln. I must stop watching the History Channel before I go to bed.
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
I want to be your penis for a week.
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
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