ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
This guy legit just tried to LSAT formal logic his way into my pants. Contrapositives and everything.
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
Since you haven't talked to me since the rancid whipped cream fiasco, I'm going to assume we are no longer hooking up. But I need my handcuffs back. ASAP.
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
No no no...you park the car, stick your tongue down his throat, slip your number in his pocket, invite him to insomnia, and THEN LEAVE. You go from awkward to epic in a matter of seconds.
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
Thank you for not boning my boss.
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
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