I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
It'll be a Christmas-Fucking-Miracle if we get through the ceremony without a groomsman vomming
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
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