i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
i just made my gag reflex go away.
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
I offered you a bag but you said "I gotta break in the new carpet" and you puked all over the floor
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
Just saw the mall santa roll by on a rascal scooter holding a chic-fil-a milkshake and stop to chat up trio of cute 20-somethings. New hero.
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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