Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
We just started the day with vitamin bombs. Daily vitamin + whatever's left in your glass from last night = feel like a champion
I just can't deal with that sentence
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
Randomize
