Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
Do you know how much wine is in a box of wine? Not so much an amount, but whether it will kill me if I drink the entire box this xmas
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
Randomize
