I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
Turns out my GF and my FWB have a mutual friend. Yada yada yada, I need to crash on your couch
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
Randomize