Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
He said he'd prefer a photo rather than discuss politics, I sent him a snapchat "conservative shorts 4 conservative man". He said "be liberal"
New low: eating a buttered roll while taking a shit.
This is why we're soulmates.
I better get weekly incoherent text messages or I will assume something is wrong.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
Randomize
