Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
Me ending up in the fetal position in my shower is becoming far too commonplace. It's like a weekly therapy session
Gym?
Sweet baby Jebus, no. I'm Motley Crue hungover. This must be how it feels to rail a line of ants.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
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